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Article by Lauren Cahn of "Eat this not that" Until you get the vaccine, you can try eating your way to a stronger immune system. COVID-19 is now associated with at least 98 symptoms, some of which you never want to experience, and others that may not go away. Unfortunately, it's currently not possible to make yourself immune to the virus that causes COVID-19, even if you've already had it. So it's crucial to know what you can do right now to cut your COVID risk as cases continue to spike. It's important to steer clear of these 100 worst foods for cold and flu and these 20 foods that are surprisingly hard on your immune system, and instead, eat in a way that supports the hard work your immune system has to do this winter. According to registered dietitian Elisa Bremner, that means limiting processed foods, eating in moderation, and partaking in any or all of the following "super-immune boosters." (Related: The 7 Healthiest Foods to Eat Right Now.) 1) Mushrooms Mushrooms have a longstanding reputation for supporting immune function, and lately, their name has been coming up in scientific literature that addresses foods that help cut COVID risk. Not only are mushrooms linked to increasing the number and strength of the body's immunity-boosting T-cells, but they're also one of the only natural food sources of vitamin D, according to Bremner. Vitamin D is one of just two vitamins infectious disease expert, Dr. Anthony Fauci has said he bothers supplementing in an effort to cut his own COVID risk. In addition, Bremner points out that shitake mushrooms, in particular, are a good source of zinc, a mineral that's crucial to immune system function. 2) Red bell peppers Dr. Fauci has also been supplementing vitamin C because, as he says, it's a good antioxidant (which means, among other things, that it helps combat free radicals in your body, which can contribute to disease). However, if you want to maximize the vitamin C you can get from your diet, Bremner suggests slicing up some red bell peppers and adding them to, well, everything. "Most people, when they think of vitamin C, think of citrus," Bremner tells Eat This, Not That!, "but peppers are packed with even more." 3) Garlic Garlic has a long history as an herbal remedy and has been cited by many experts in many studies for its immune-boosting properties. "Among other things, garlic contains a component called allicin, which is not only antibacterial but also anti-inflammatory," according to Alicia Galvin, Resident Dietitian for Sovereign Laboratories>. 4) Ginger Ginger's anti-inflammatory properties can help lessen the upper-respiratory symptoms that are associated with COVID-19. "When you eat ginger, you can feel that heat and you know it's fighting," observes Bremner. While there hasn't been a ton of research into ginger's antiviral properties, we know it fights hard against bacterial threats. And perhaps more importantly, research suggests ginger can help control high blood pressure," which poses a significant risk to people who do end up getting COVID-19. 5) Broccoli Broccoli is basically the standard-bearer when it comes to superfoods, Bremner tells Eat This, Not That! "You can't beat its combination of vitamins A, C, and E, all of which are known to help boost immune function. Vitamin A, in particular, may help cut your risk of COVID-19, Bremner points out, in that it supports healthier internal tissues, including the lining of the respiratory tract. And as an extra-added bonus, vitamin A may be instrumental in helping you lose weight this winter. 6) Yogurt Yogurt is rich in protein, vitamins, and trace elements, all of which are necessary for maintaining optimal immune response. Perhaps more importantly, yogurt is a great source of probiotics, which help support the gut microbiome, which is, itself, critical to supporting immune function, according to Bremner. Bonus points if you select Greek yogurt, which is even higher in protein than other yogurts 7) Sauerkraut Sauerkraut is another food that supports the immune system via the gut microbiome. What makes sauerkraut so powerful as an immune system supporter, according to Galvin, is the fact that it is fermented. Fermented foods are a great source of good bacteria for the gut. In addition, fermentation enhances the antioxidant properties of the cabbage sauerkraut is made from. The opinions expressed here by Bergen Review Media columnists are their own, not those of Bergenreview.com.
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County Route 563 runs for 43.87 miles through South Jersey, from Margate City in Atlantic County to Woodland Township, Burlington County. It takes drivers from our beautiful beaches to our peaceful Pinelands in under an hour (depending on traffic) and offers scenic views along the way. Many readers have recommended this drive and we agree – you won’t want to miss it! While it’s not necessarily bucket list material, long drives are a way of life for many of us right now and this is one that’s worth checking out. Depending on your schedule and location, you can start or end your drive in Margate City. While there, be sure to visit Lucy. Educational tours of the iconic elephant are a blast for kids and adults alike. Be sure to bring your face covering.  If you think Lucy is incredible on the outside, you will absolutely love the inside! The staff and gift shop are fantastic, as well. You may also want to spend some time on the beach while you're here. County Road 563 officially begins on Jerome Avenue in Margate, a 5-lane road that traverses residential areas.  It also offers limited bay views until you Transition to Margate Boulevard and cross a toll bridge with fantastic views of Shelter Island Bay and Whirlpool Channel  This is one of my favorite sections of the drive. Next, you'll pass through wetlands and marshland. Not seen in this photo is Atlantic City, which is visible in the distance.  Marshes are similar to swamps but swampland is dominated by trees while marshland is home to tall grasses and other plants Be on the lookout for Terrapin turtles while you're driving past the mars  The entire area is rich with wildlife You'll pass through a suburban stretch with shopping, dining, movie theaters, and more. You'll also be just minutes away from the beloved Storybook Land Amusement Park in Egg Harbor Township  It's a 5-minute detour if you're interested in visiting. Reservations are strongly suggested. Face coverings (for those age 2 and up) are required Next up is the Atlantic City International Airport and the 177th Fighter Wing of New Jersey's Air National Guard  Who doesn't love passing these planes? After a brief merge with Route 30 and some residential/industrial areas, you'll cross the Mullica River.  If you didn't feel like you were in the Pinelands before, now you can be sure. You'll enjoy woodlands for miles as you pass through the Pinelands National Reserve and Wharton State Forest.  This area offers a variety of hiking trails and is near the historic Batsto Village There will be fields and farmland near Chatsworth.  These red buildings sure stand out! The last landscape you'll enjoy is the Garden State's stunning cranberry bogs  They're not always so bright and vibrant (this photo was taken during the harvest season in early to mid-autumn) but they are always interesting. We’re aware that these uncertain times are limiting many aspects of life as we all practice social and physical distancing. While we’re continuing to feature destinations that make our state wonderful, we don’t expect or encourage you to go check them out immediately. We believe that supporting local attractions is important now more than ever and we hope this articles inspire your future adventures!  Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.
As important as it is to learn how to deal with different kinds of people, truly toxic people will never be worth your time and energy — and they take a lot of each. Toxic people create unnecessary complexity, strife, and, worst of all, stress. “People inspire you, or they drain you — pick them wisely.” – Hans F. Hansen Recent research from Friedrich Schiller University in Germany shows just how serious toxic people are. They found that exposure to stimuli that cause strong negative emotions — the same kind of exposure you get when dealing with toxic people — caused subjects’ brains to have a massive stress response. Whether it’s negativity, cruelty, the victim syndrome, or just plain craziness, toxic people drive your brain into a stressed-out state that should be avoided at all costs. Studies have long shown that stress can have a lasting, negative impact on the brain. Exposure to even a few days of stress compromises the effectiveness of neurons in the hippocampus, an important brain area responsible for reasoning and memory. Weeks of stress cause reversible damage to brain cells, and months of stress can permanently destroy them. Toxic people don’t just make you miserable — they’re really hard on your brain. The ability to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. TalentSmart has conducted research with more than a million people, and we’ve found that 90% of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions in times of stress in order to remain calm and in control. One of their greatest gifts is the ability to identify toxic people and keep them at bay. It’s often said that you’re the product of the five people you spend the most time with. If you allow even one of those five people to be toxic, you’ll soon find out how capable he or she is of holding you back. You can’t hope to distance yourself from toxic people until you first know who they are. The trick is to separate those who are annoying or simply difficult from those who are truly toxic. What follows are ten types of toxic drainers that you should stay away from at all costs so that you don’t become one yourself. 1. The gossip “Great minds discuss ideas, average ones discuss events, and small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt Gossipers derive pleasure from other people’s misfortunes. It might be fun to peer into somebody else’s personal or professional faux pas at first, but over time, it gets tiring, makes you feel gross, and hurts other people. There are too many positives out there and too much to learn from interesting people to waste your time talking about the misfortune of others. 2. The temperamental Some people have absolutely no control over their emotions. They will lash out at you and project their feelings onto you, all the while thinking that you’re the one causing their malaise. Temperamental people are tough to dump from your life because their lack of control over their emotions makes you feel bad for them. When push comes to shove though, temperamental people will use you as their emotional toilet and should be avoided at all costs. 3. The Victim Victims are tough to identify because you initially empathize with their problems. But as time passes, you begin to realize that their “time of need” is all the time. Victims actively push away any personal responsibility by making every speed bump they encounter into an uncrossable mountain. They don’t see tough times as opportunities to learn and grow from; instead, they see them as an out. There’s an old saying: “Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.” It perfectly captures the toxicity of the victim, who chooses to suffer every time. 4. The self-absorbed Self-absorbed people bring you down through the impassionate distance they maintain from other people. You can usually tell when you’re hanging around self-absorbed people because you start to feel completely alone. This happens because as far as they’re concerned, there’s no point in having a real connection between them and anyone else. You’re merely a tool used to build their self-esteem. 5. The envious To envious people, the grass is always greener somewhere else. Even when something great happens to envious people, they don’t derive any satisfaction from it. This is because they measure their fortune against the world’s when they should be deriving their satisfaction from within. And let’s face it, there’s always someone out there who’s doing better if you look hard enough. Spending too much time around envious people is dangerous because they teach you to trivialize your own accomplishments. 6. The manipulator Manipulators suck time and energy out of your life under the façade of friendship. They can be tricky to deal with because they treat you like a friend. They know what you like, what makes you happy, and what you think is funny, but the difference is that they use this information as part of a hidden agenda. Manipulators always want something from you, and if you look back on your relationships with them, it’s all take, take, take, with little or no giving. They’ll do anything to win you over just so they can work you over. 7. The dementor In J. K. Rowling’s “Harry Potter” series, Dementors are evil creatures that suck people’s souls out of their bodies, leaving them merely as shells of humans. Whenever a Dementor enters the room, it goes dark, people get cold, and they begin to recall their worst memories. Rowling said that she developed the concept for Dementors based on highly negative people—the kind of people who have the ability to walk into a room and instantly suck the life out of it. Dementors suck the life out of the room by imposing their negativity and pessimism upon everyone they encounter. Their viewpoints are always glass half empty, and they can inject fear and concern into even the most benign situations. A Notre Dame University study found that students assigned to roommates who thought negatively were far more likely to develop negative thinking and even depression themselves. 8. The twisted There are certain toxic people who have bad intentions, deriving deep satisfaction from the pain and misery of others. They are either out to hurt you, to make you feel bad, or to get something from you; otherwise, they have no interest in you. The only good thing about this type is that you can spot their intentions quickly, which makes it that much faster to get them out of your life. 9. The judgmental Judgmental people are quick to tell you exactly what is and isn’t cool. They have a way of taking the thing you’re most passionate about and making you feel terrible about it. Instead of appreciating and learning from people who are different from them, judgmental people look down on others. Judgmental people stifle your desire to be a passionate, expressive person, so you’re best off cutting them out and being yourself. 10. The arrogant Arrogant people are a waste of your time because they see everything you do as a personal challenge. Arrogance is false confidence, and it always masks major insecurities. A University of Akron study found that arrogance is correlated with a slew of problems in the workplace. Arrogant people tend to be lower performers, more disagreeable, and have more cognitive problems than the average person. How to protect yourself once you spot ‘em Toxic people drive you crazy because their behavior is so irrational. Make no mistake about it — their behavior truly goes against reason, so why do you allow yourself to respond to them emotionally and get sucked into the mix? The more irrational and off-base someone is, the easier it should be for you to remove yourself from their traps. Quit trying to beat them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally, and approach your interactions with them like they’re a science project (or you’re their shrink if you prefer that analogy). You don’t need to respond to the emotional chaos — only the facts. Maintaining an emotional distance requires awareness. You can’t stop someone from pushing your buttons if you don’t recognize when it’s happening. Sometimes you’ll find yourself in situations where you’ll need to regroup and choose the best way forward. This is fine, and you shouldn’t be afraid to buy yourself some time to do so. Most people feel as though because they work or live with someone, they have no way to control the chaos. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Once you’ve identified a toxic person, you’ll begin to find their behavior more predictable and easier to understand. This will equip you to think rationally about when and where you have to put up with them and when and where you don’t. You can establish boundaries, but you’ll have to do so consciously and proactively. If you let things happen naturally, you’re bound to find yourself constantly embroiled in difficult conversations. If you set boundaries and decide when and where you’ll engage a difficult person, you can control much of the chaos. The only trick is to stick to your guns and keep boundaries in place when the person tries to cross them, which they will. Article Contributed by Travis Bradberry. Travis Bradberry is the coauthor of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and the cofounder of TalentSmart. This article originally appeared on LinkedIn  When emotional intelligence (EQ) first appeared to the masses, it served as the missing link in a peculiar finding: people with average IQs outperform those with the highest IQs 70% of the time. This anomaly threw a massive wrench into the broadly held assumption that IQ was the sole source of success. Decades of research now point to emotional intelligence as being the critical factor that sets star performers apart from the rest of the pack. The connection is so strong that 90% of top performers have high emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence can also be very useful when it comes to alleviating stress. In an article for The Harvard Business Review, Kandi Wiens, a Senior Fellow at the University of Pennsylvania Graduate School of Education in the PennCLO Executive Doctoral Program and Director of the Penn Master’s in Medical Education Program, wrote, “When we can’t focus at work because of distractions, it may lead us to feel stressed about not being productive, which then causes us to focus less, further feeding the cycle. Unfortunately, most of us don’t notice our focus declining until we become completely overwhelmed.” But by using emotional intelligence skills such as self-awareness, mindfulness, and shifting our focus to others we can break this cycle. “Instead, pay attention to the causes of your stress and inability to focus and then take actions that promote improvements in the specific brain functions that drive concentration and awareness.” It should also be noted that emotional intelligence accounts for 90% of career advancements, emotional intelligence is responsible for 58% of your job performance and people who have these types of skills make $29,000 more, on average than their non-emotionally intelligent colleagues. “No doubt emotional intelligence is more rare than book smarts, but my experience says it is actually more important in the making of a leader. You just can’t ignore it.” – Jack Welch Emotional intelligence is the “something” in each of us that is a bit intangible. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions to achieve positive results. Despite the significance of EQ, its intangible nature makes it very difficult to know how much you have and what you can do to improve if you’re lacking. You can always take a scientifically validated test, such as the one that comes with the Emotional Intelligence 2.0 book.
Unfortunately, quality (scientifically valid) EQ tests aren’t free. So, I’ve analyzed the data from the million-plus people Talent Smart has tested in order to identify the behaviors that are the hallmarks of a low EQ. These are the behaviors that you want to eliminate from your repertoire. You don’t get angry Emotional intelligence is not about being nice; it’s about managing your emotions to achieve the best possible outcomes. Sometimes this means showing people that you’re upset, sad, or frustrated. Constantly masking your emotions with happiness and positivity isn’t genuine or productive. Emotionally intelligent people employ negative and positive emotions intentionally in the appropriate situations. You get stressed easily When you stuff your feelings, they quickly build into the uncomfortable sensations of tension, stress, and anxiety. Unaddressed emotions strain the mind and body. Your emotional intelligence skills help make stress more manageable by enabling you to spot and tackle tough situations before things escalate. People who fail to use their emotional intelligence skills are more likely to turn to other, less effective means of managing their mood. They are twice as likely to experience anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and even thoughts of suicide. You have difficulty asserting yourself. People with high EQs balance good manners, empathy, and kindness with the ability to assert themselves and establish boundaries. This tactful combination is ideal for handling conflict. When most people are crossed, they default to passive or aggressive behavior. Emotionally intelligent people remain balanced and assertive by steering themselves away from unfiltered emotional reactions. This enables them to neutralize difficult and toxic people without creating enemies. You have a limited emotional vocabulary All people experience emotions, but it is a select few who can accurately identify them as they occur. Our research shows that only 36% of people can do this, which is problematic because unlabeled emotions often go misunderstood, which leads to irrational choices and counterproductive actions. People with high EQs master their emotions because they understand them, and they use an extensive vocabulary of feelings to do so. While many people might describe themselves as simply feeling “bad,” emotionally intelligent people can pinpoint whether they feel “irritable,” “frustrated,” “downtrodden,” or “anxious.” The more specific your word choice, the better insight you have into exactly how you are feeling, what caused it, and what you should do about it. You make assumptions quickly and defend them vehementlyPeople who lack EQ form an opinion quickly and then succumb to confirmation bias, meaning they gather evidence that supports their opinion and ignore any evidence to the contrary. More often than not, they argue, ad nauseam, to support it. This is especially dangerous for leaders, as their under-thought-out ideas become the entire team’s strategy. Emotionally intelligent people let their thoughts marinate because they know that initial reactions are driven by emotions. They give their thoughts time to develop and consider the possible consequences and counter-arguments. Then, they communicate their developed idea in the most effective way possible, taking into account the needs and opinions of their audience. You hold grudges The negative emotions that come with holding on to a grudge are actually a stress response. Just thinking about the event sends your body into fight-or-flight mode, a survival mechanism that forces you to stand up and fight or run for the hills when faced with a threat. When a threat is imminent, this reaction is essential to your survival, but when a threat is ancient history, holding on to that stress wreaks havoc on your body and can have devastating health consequences over time. In fact, researchers at Emory University have shown that holding on to stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease. Holding on to a grudge means you’re holding on to stress, and emotionally intelligent people know to avoid this at all costs. Letting go of a grudge not only makes you feel better now but can also improve your health. You don’t let go of mistakes. Emotionally intelligent people distance themselves from their mistakes, but they do so without forgetting them. By keeping their mistakes at a safe distance, yet still handy enough to refer to, they are able to adapt and adjust for future success. It takes refined self-awareness to walk this tightrope between dwelling and remembering. Dwelling too long on your mistakes makes you anxious and gun shy, while forgetting about them completely makes you bound to repeat them. The key to balance lies in your ability to transform failures into nuggets of improvement. This creates the tendency to get right back up every time you fall down. You often feel misunderstood. When you lack emotional intelligence, it’s hard to understand how you come across to others. You feel misunderstood because you don’t deliver your message in a way that people can understand. Even with practice, emotionally intelligent people know that they don’t communicate every idea perfectly. They catch on when people don’t understand what they are saying, adjust their approach, and re-communicate their idea in a way that can be understood You don’t know your triggers. Everyone has triggers — situations and people that push their buttons and cause them to act impulsively. Emotionally intelligent people study their triggers and use this knowledge to sidestep situations and people before they get the best of them. You blame other people for how they make you feel. Emotions come from within. It’s tempting to attribute how you feel to the actions of others, but you must take responsibility for your emotions. No one can make you feel anything that you don’t want to. Thinking otherwise only holds you back. You’re easily offended. If you have a firm grasp of who you are, it’s difficult for someone to say or do something that gets your goat. Emotionally intelligent people are self-confident and open-minded, which create a pretty thick skin. You may even poke fun at yourself or let other people make jokes about you because you are able to mentally draw the line between humor and degradation Bringing it all together Unlike your IQ, your EQ is highly malleable. As you train your brain by repeatedly practicing new emotionally intelligent behaviors, it builds the pathways needed to make them into habits. As your brain reinforces the use of these new behaviors, the connections supporting old, destructive behaviors die off. Before long, you begin responding to your surroundings with emotional intelligence without even having to think about it.  All meditation is created equal, right? You sit, with your eyes closed, and concentrate on deep breathing. Not necessarily. Some types of meditation can help calm your mind, while others focus on improving mental clarity, while others help improve deep breathing and wellness. Regardless of your ultimate goal with meditation, it will help improve overall well-being and have a calming effect on you. It’s the place where you can sit for just 10 minutes, and gain more insight into your mind and how it works. But what types of meditation are best for you, and which ones will deliver the goals/outcomes you want to see? Consider a few of these different types of meditation if you’re new to meditation and want to improve your mind, body, and spirit. Types of meditation When it comes to what kind of meditation to start with, always consider your needs, goals, and personal preferences. It also doesn’t hurt to give all of the following types of meditation practices a try. Instead of letting someone else tell you what kind of meditation to practice, see for yourself. The type of meditation practice you choose may also depend on your learning style. If you want to learn with a teacher or at a meditation retreat, certain forms of meditation will be better suited for you than others. If you’re interested in learning meditation on your own at home, start with a simple practice that allows you to use a guided meditation app. Open Monitoring  This form of meditation focuses on keeping your attention on an object, without judgment surrounding it. You’ll focus on clearing preconceived notions, ideas, perceptions, and attachments to that object. Therefore, you don’t focus on the ways you believe it smells, looks, and feels; instead, you focus on the object, with a clear frame of mind and no conceptual bias before seeing it. The sole purpose is for non-reactive monitoring. This helps you learn how to be less judgmental outside yourself as well. At work, meeting new people, in new friendship groups, or even when you’re going to a local event you’re invited to, you’ll learn to arrive at these places, and just enjoy the environment and the people there. You don’t take any preconceived ideas or notions with you, and only let them form after the fact. Loving Kindness This form of meditation, loving-kindness meditation, is also known as Metta meditation; your focus is to cultivate loving feelings and kindness towards the things, people, and society around you. You don’t have enemies or external stresses. Instead, you focus on loving thoughts, thoughts of kindness, and making peace with everything and everyone around you. Practitioners of this type of meditation are open to external loving and kindness and accept it from others. Towards your loved ones, strangers, or even your boss/coworkers. You want to build a better world around you and focus on loving, kindness, and cultivating an environment of peace that surrounds you. Focuses on reducing anger, frustration, stress, resentment, and interpersonal conflicts, are top priorities when practicing this type of meditation. Mindfulness Mindfulness meditation is another one of the primary types of meditation that will help improve yourself from within. This form of meditation helps you to remain aware of the here and now, rather than focusing on what’s to come, or what has already happened. You’re focusing on remaining mindful of the thing you are doing, or the location you are at right now. You are not thinking about what will come next, where you have to be after work, or what time you have to pick up the kids. Your primary focus is on what you are doing, regardless of the level of importance, and learning to let go of things that are not right in front of you. It’s also a great type of meditation for beginners. You can do this almost anywhere. If you are stuck at the doctor’s office, don’t think of it as being stuck. Instead, focus on clearing your mind. Focus on your health and wellness. Think about improving yourself with the visit you’re going to have with the doctor. If you’re at a long line at the grocery store, you’ll focus on waiting and patience. You aren’t focused on the drive home, or unloading the groceries. Just focus on being present, and being where you are, when you are there. Vipassana (Insight)  Vipassana is a type of meditation that is very similar to mindfulness. It’s a tradition from Tibetan Buddhism that translates to “insight” in English. The goal of insight meditation is to delve into the body and mind’s connection through contemplative practice. During this meditative practice, you practice being “the watcher.” The watcher is a non-judgemental open awareness of thoughts, sensations, and feelings that come and go through consciousness. Often, placing this awareness on the breath is the vehicle to reach this meditative state. With enough practice, it’s possible to get a glimpse of “the watcher.” You can begin to see your open-awareness as just another experience in consciousness. Body Scan This is one of the best types of meditation for scanning oneself, your body, and encourages practitioners to find areas of tension from within. Body scan meditation is also often referred to as progression meditation. Its primary goal is to help you alleviate tension, improve the muscular system, and focus on relaxation sessions. You’ll typically start at one end of your body and work your way through the body. Throughout the practice, find areas of tension, and focus on targeting relaxation and relaxing thoughts to those areas. This form of meditation can help improve chronic pain, help alleviate tension and stress, and improve muscular and skeletal system pain over time. It’s also a more accessible practice to learn for beginners as it engages your attention more than other types of meditation. Kundalini Yoga  This form of physical activity or meditation, focuses on the mantras alongside deep breathing techniques. You concentrate on deep breathing, to help “eliminate toxins.” This is what is claimed, but we prefer the more scientific benefits around Kundalini, such as removing harmful thoughts from within. You’ll breathe slowly and deeply when you’re engaged in this physical meditation. You’re here to focus on breathing in and breathing out, and you’re trying to eliminate the clutter and any other thoughts that come into the mind while you’re partaking in this form of yoga and meditation. This type of meditation helps reduce levels of anxiety, helps with relaxation, and improves emotional flexibility to block out the external negativities around you. Plus, you’re getting in some physical activity as well, so it’s beneficial for the mind, body, and overall well-being. Transcendental  With this type of meditation, you’re focused on the spiritual aspects of improving yourself. You’ll remain seated and focus on deep breathing techniques when performing transcendental meditation. Focus is on a specific mantra or a focused-word intended to help improve oneself and positive perceptions about yourself.
You’re focused on transcending and rising above your current state when engaging in this meditation. You want to take yourself to a higher level, and improve your self-value and worth with the positive mantra you’re repeating. The more you say it, the more you will believe it, and transcend into a deeper, better state over time. With Transcendental Meditation, you are given a mantra from a licensed teacher. The mantra acts as a vehicle to help you get to a meditative state. One of the downsides of this type of meditation is that it costs a lot of money to learn. Your turn These aren’t the only types of meditation to help improve your overall well-being, mind, body, and spirit. They are just some of the most popular types of meditation that practitioners engage in. Regardless of your level, what you want to improve, or where you are in life, these are some of the best meditative practices, to help you improve your mind, way of thinking, and way of perceiving the world around you, while improving the inner thoughts you have about yourself along the way. If you’re new to meditation and don’t know where to start, try Declutter The Mind. It offers a new guided meditation practice every day and offers a 30-day meditation course for beginners, which will introduce you to mindfulness meditation. Is there a meditation type you prefer or like? Let us know in the comments below. This article originally appeared at Declutter The Mind  We take a closer look at what it feels like to be a woman making six-figures — when only 5% of American women make that much, according to the U.S. Census — with the hope it will give women insight into how to better navigate their own career and salary trajectories.
We talked with a marketing manager from Seattle, WA. Job: Marketing Manager, Tech Age: 28 Location: Seattle, WA Degree: Bachelor's in Marketing First Salary: $40,000 Current Salary: $150,000 As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? "It took me a long time to realize that I can succeed in both qualitative and quantitative fields. I used to really enjoying writing short stories when I was younger and thought that I might become a professional writer as an adult, but that interest dwindled after too many boring writing projects in college." What did you study in college? "I have a bachelor's degree in business with a focus on marketing." Did you have to take out student loans? "My mother put money away throughout my entire childhood to help fund my education because her parents had funded hers, so I only had to take out $3,000 worth of loans for my bachelor's degree. I also did many, many internships, some unpaid, and my mother helped pay for living expenses during those years." Have you been working at this company since you graduated from college? "I graduated college only a few years ago (I'm a late bloomer) and did five internships while in college because most of my degree was completed online. Since graduating, I've had four different jobs, so I haven't stayed anywhere for longer than a year. I think this has greatly contributed to my quick salary growth." How would you explain your day-to-day role at your job? "I usually check email first and respond to anything that I didn't feel comfortable knocking out on my phone. Next, I check business intelligence reports to review the status of our business from the last day or two. Every day is different, but at that point I might have a meeting or two, take lunch, and then start working down a list of projects. My job is incredibly chill, and I'm able to pace my day out however I want, and I can usually come in late and leave early. It's pretty great." Did you negotiate your salary? "I'm in a somewhat specialized area of marketing, so I tend to get offers towards the top of salary ranges. That said, I did attempt to negotiate my base salary at my current company. They gave me a very small bump, but ultimately I was more successful negotiating for stock and work-from-home benefits." Is your current job your “passion”? If not, what is? "Definitely not. I started out in fashion — an industry I really did love — right when I graduated college. But the pay was so much lower that I ultimately decided to prioritize salary and made the switch to where I am now. I sleep well at night knowing that I'm setting up a financially secure future for myself, but I wish I didn't have to sacrifice the best years of my life for a paycheck. I hope that I'll find an out one day." If you could, would you change anything in your career trajectory? "I wish that I could somehow gain the ability to see what life might have been like if I had pursued something more fun and 'me,' but I do think I've ended up in a really good place in the world. I have no idea how things might have gone with any trajectory shift, so I probably wouldn't choose to change anything from the past." What professional advice would you give your younger self? "Stop prioritizing shallow friendships over your career. Those people are bringing you down and distracting you from any kind of real growth. Don't be afraid to be alone and leave your comfort zone to find out what you're really capable of without the influence of others. Also, spend more time with coworkers. Network and build relationships, because work is going to be miserable without people to eat lunch with. Also, finding your next gig is going to be a lot more difficult without help."  While you may be able to guess some common causes of breakups, there are things therapists want you to know about why these things can result in the end of a relationship.
It isn't always easy, after all, to have an outside perspective, notice these problems, and recognize the damage they can do. But by learning more about them, you and your partner may be better able to keep your connection strong. To start, it's important to know that "many relationship problems do have a root in poor communication," Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a clinical psychologist and relationship expert, tells Bustle. If you aren't listening to each other, or arguing in a healthy way, frustrations will build — and you may break up. Of course, there are also other factors, such as dishonesty, disrespect, and infidelity, that can obviously have a big impact, too, Manly says. If any of these things sound familiar, though, rest assured there are ways to turn your relationship around. Speaking with a couples therapist can be a big help, especially if you have ongoing issues that you haven't been able to resolve. Establishing boundaries, or relationship "rules," can be beneficial, too. But most of all, it can help to avoid making these mistakes whenever possible, since experts say can very easily result in a breakup. Read on for a few common mistakes, why they can take such a toll, and how you may be able to set them right. Not Spending Enough Time Together While you may want to spend all your time together in the early days of your relationship, it's important to keep that going as the years go on — and work on maintaining a sense of fun. Because if you fall into a rut, Manly says, you can lose interest in each other and drift apart. "Relationships thrive when couples spend time together that is connective in nature," she says. "This might include exercising, cooking, playing, or other activities that allow for emotional and physical connection." If you feel like you've lost your spark, you may want to schedule more time together, and make an effort to hang out. Manly says to turn off technology, put aside your work, and get rid of any outside distractions, and "use this time to connect and tune in to each other." Being Dishonest "Dishonesty is one of the prime killers of relationships," Manly says, which is why it's important to create the type of connection where it's OK to share what's on your mind, and tell the truth. A few white lies may sneak through, but that doesn't mean all is lost. "Depending on the type and level of dishonesty, healing may certainly be possible," she says. "In many cases, a relationship therapist can help get things back on track, but both partners must be committed to ongoing honesty for true and lasting healing." If you can't do this for each other, and set a few ground rules to keep dishonesty at bay, a breakup may not be far away. Communicating In A Toxic Way "Healthy, positive communication is as essential to a healthy relationship as clean air is to our bodies," Manly says. Without it, it's nearly impossible to keep a relationship alive. You may feel frustrated, and not know how to meet each other's needs. And before you know it, you're breaking up. "In cases where toxic communication has made things go awry, couples can work on healthy communication skills through couples therapy [...] and then make a daily practice of using the positive skills learned," Manly says. You may also want to practice listening skills, and truly hearing what the other has to say. Many arguments and toxic convos stem from not listening, so this can be a great place to start, and it may even help get your relationship back on track. Arguing About Money It may not come as a surprise that disagreements about money can drive a couple apart. In fact, it just so happens to be one of the top causes of divorce. But here's why. "Couples often have different views about how money should be managed and if money is tight, the stress can be overwhelming causing couples to lash out at each other," Dr. Jeff Nalin, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist and founder and chief clinical officer of Paradigm Malibu Treatment Center, tells Bustle. In other words, it isn't so much about not having money, but how you deal with it as a couple. "Communication is one major key to a successful relationship," Nalin says. "To turn things around, couples need to work on their communication where money is concerned. Examining the finances together, budgeting, and setting long-term goals can help couples to work together in a healthier way." This will lessen your chances of having toxic arguments, which will keep you from resenting each other, which will hopefully prevent all this money talk from breaking you up. Not Prioritizing Each Other "One interesting commonality across most relationship killers is this: one or both partners do not make a healthy relationship a top priority," Manly says. "And, when the relationship is not a top priority, the ongoing learning and growing required for a healthy relationship simply [won't] happen." Of course, that doesn't mean you can't also focus on work, friends, goals, and hobbies outside of your relationship. But that putting those things first, 100 percent of the time, can cause you to lose that all-important connection. Cheating According to Nalin, infidelity is another common cause of breakups. It can take the form of an emotional affair, micro-cheating, and physical affairs, all of which can be painful in their own way. Due to the breach of trust, it can be tough for a couple to move past an affair, and find their footing again. But making a concerted effort to patch it all up can save your relationship, if you choose to do so. You may want to go to couples therapy, Nalin says, and figure out how to work through it. It may also serve as a good moment to learn more about your relationship, and what you can do to prevent a similar problem from happening in the future. Not Respecting Each Other "Respect is one of the highest core values of relationships," Celine Sauvet, a certified dating and relationship coach, tells Bustle. And without it, it makes sense why a relationship might crumble. "When a partner does not show respect (yelling at the partner, calling [them] names, make [them] feeling bad, etc.) this becomes a toxic relationship," she says. "To avoid that, ensure [you] have healthy boundaries." In some situations, it may be necessary to leave, and that's OK. But you can work to build up trust and respect in your relationship, in many situations, by sticking to those aforementioned rules. These issues may be the most common causes of breakups, but they don't have to happen to you and your partner, if you know how to avoid them 
We've got the perfect plan to get you started.
There's no denying that it gets harder to fend off belly fat as we age. But with proper guidance and a little motivation, you can outsmart fluctuating hormones and a dwindling metabolism to transform your health and body. "The biggest reasons women struggle with seeing results after age 40 are because they don't incorporate strength training and they're afraid to eat real food," says Los Angeles-based fitness expert and trainer Sarah Kusch, creator of The Toning Transformation DVD. "Eating clean and picking up weights—even light ones—are the fastest ways to change your body."Use this plan to get started. STEP 1: START MOVING "The key to success with exercise is consistency," says Kusch. "You need a simple plan that starts slow, builds as you get stronger, and doesn't take a lot of time or effort." Aim to work out for about 20 minutes at a time, using routines that you can adjust to your fitness level. Tone and strengthen all over: Research shows that lifting weights can make a big difference in the way your body looks and feels, which is why strength training is a pivotal part of this plan. In fact, when postmenopausal women did two strength-training sessions a week, they significantly reduced their body fat and waist circumference in 6 weeks, according to a study published in the journal Menopause.Turn up your burn: Combine toning with short but fast-paced bursts of action to make over your muscle tissue and fire up your metabolism. Cue up your core: Engage your core and access those deep muscles during every movement for optimal toning. The result: a firmer, flatter belly and better posture. Squeeze in stretching: With just a few minutes of gentle motion, you'll release tension, enhance recovery, and improve flexibility. "Stretching reduces aches and pains, and it feels amazing," says Kusch. 4 Fitness Must-Haves
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​STEP 2: EAT HEALTHY Opt for whole foods (think fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins like poultry, fish, and lentils) and avoiding as many processed foods as possible. When you eat this way, you'll automatically fill your plate with nutrient-dense foods that boost energy, build muscle, and fight disease-causing inflammation, Kusch points out. You'll also slash added sugar and trim extra calories without even noticing they're gone. 4 Nutrition Must-Haves
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Written, Compiled & Edited byThe Bergen Review Media Team Archives
October 2024
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